Anelie Moon

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"anelie, obviously. it's my name, right?"

I HAVE TO ASK: MALE, FEMALE, OR SOMETHING IN BETWEEN?
"i didn't have a penis, last time i checked."

GOOD, I WAS STARTING TO WORRY. NOW, HOW OLD ARE YOU EXACTLY?
"born on october the thirteenth, in 1989. meaning, yes kiddos, i'm nineteen years old. lastly, i'm a libra."

WELL, YOU LOOK YOUNG FOR YOUR AGE. HOW DO YOU STAY IN SHAPE?
"i have a lot of sex? i mean, really. what kind of a question is that!? i don't see how it's any of your business, in the first place."

OH, I'LL HAVE TO TRY THAT. MOVING ON: YOUR HAIR, IS THAT YOUR NATURAL COLOR?
"never died it in my life. rich brown, sometimes almost black in the right lighting."

DON'T MEAN TO BE A PEST BUT, HOW TALL ARE YOU EXACTLY?
"i'm five foot, and six inches. can't say i can complain about my height, it's pretty average if you ask me."

I WOULD NEVER HAVE CONSIDERED THAT GEORGE CLOONEY MIGHT BE GAY. WHAT ABOUT YOU?
"i had this creepy dream about that guy; he was dating my best friend's mom, and i moved in with them. and then he started hitting on me. ew!

and for the record, im not-so-straight. but im not a lesbian."

OH REALLY? WELL, WHAT BAND ARE YOU IN WHAT'S YOUR POSITION?
"lead guitar, for empty threat, ba-bay!"

WELL THEN, WHAT DO YOU LIKE TO DO IN YOUR SPARE TIME?
"what else is someone in a band going to do when they aren't jamming!? PIG OUT! food is my number one favorite past time. cooking it, smelling it, eating it. but im no fatty, no-sir. of course . . . im just one of those lucky kids that can stuff their faces and not gain a pound."

DON'T WORRY, THIS IS ALL CONFIDENTIAL. GO AHEAD, TELL US WHAT YOU ENJOY.
"i enjoy my peace and quiet. and people who don't try to pry into my life . . ."

WHAT ABOUT SOMETHING THAT GETS ON YOUR NERVES?
"i've got a lot of pet peeves. like when people don't bother to pick up their trash from the floor, and you step in it. or when someone smells bad, and doesn't bother not to stay away from you so you don't have to smell it. ignorant fuckers who think they're better than you, just because their mommies and daddies have bigger noses and speak with an accent. spoiled milk, left out in the open. obsessive fans. like, really . . . they grab onto your pants, and reeeef! what's up with that!?"

I'LL HAVE TO REMEMBER THAT. SO, ARE YOU GOOD AT ANYTHING?
"i can rock the guitar like no one you've seen before! electric, acoustic . . . of course i prefer electric: i can make more noise with that! i can sing, as well, just choose not to. my voice is for select people to hear only. besides, it's really not the greatest in the world. aside from musical things, i can write and draw very decently. most of the songs for the band i've either helped make, or have edited. and half the slogans the band's come up with has been detailed by me."

THAT'S INTERESTING, NOW WHAT ARE YOU NOT SO GOOD AT?
"i find myself to be a bit of an attention whore in public. not in a bad way, or at least the worst way. i don't hike my skirts up, and drool all over my suckers. i make a fool of myself, mostly. blurt out to people who i think are being jackasses, yelling at someone to get out of my way. that kinda thing. have i mentioned that im a rather loud person before?"

I BET I CAN BEAT YOU IN A THUMB WRESTLE AND HOLD MY BREATHE LONGER THAN YOU AT THE SAME TIME.
"oh yeah!? well, i bet you that i can withstand watching all the five SAW movies, as well as all tree Jackass movies, and all the grossest fear factor shows there is, without going even the slightest shade green. and know what, to top it off!? i'll flash a cop! yeah, that's right. i totally went there."

YOU MUST THINK I'M CRAZY. OH WELL, SAY, WHAT KIND OF QUALITIES DO YOU LIKE IN A SPOUSE?
"piercings. gatta have some extra holes, even if it's only one. tattoos are a good thing to cover up skin, even when it's bare. i really like the eye colour green, too. rare to find, y'know? makes it even more special. for personality wise, they have to know how to take a joke, and how to return one. gatta be able to take a hit, too, without flinching or hesitating to give one back. i don't want a sissy as a boyfriend."

OH, I GUESS I'M NOT YOUR TYPE THEN, EH? WELL, WHAT DO YOU FIND UNATTRACTIVE IN A PERSON?
"cheesy pick up lines. one-thought mind track. preppy dressing. gangsters - unless they know how to use their brains. complete jerkoffs, y'know, the ones who whistle at you when you walk by, and when you deny them they start bashing you for no reason?"

FINE, BE LIKE THAT. I DON'T LIKE YOU ANYWAYS.
"who ever said i liked you? in fact, i find you a bit nosy. and you're kinda in my space, bro! let a girl breathe, much? seriously, though. you just aren't' that interesting, to be honest. don't even think i'd be interested if you looked like jensen ackles . . . and that's saying something!"

OK, WE'RE GONNA PLAY A GAME. I'M GOING TO ASK SOME SIMPLE QUESTIONS, AND YOUR GOING TO SAY THE FIRST THING THAT COMES TO MIND, OK?
"you wanna what!? you invade my space, and now you wanna invade my effing mind, too!? god, what is it with you people!?"

FAVORITE FOOD?
"pizza, or hot dogs."

FAVORITE MOVIE?
". . . wow. that'd be a mouthful, bud."

FAVORITE BAND/ARTIST?
"uhm. limp bizkit, for starters. metric. and muse."

FAVORITE DRINK?
"chocolate milk, or a chocolate shake."

FAVORITE SUBJECT?
"english?"

FAVORITE SPICE GIRL?
"posh! or was it baby? hmm."

FAVORITE TV SHOW?
"NCIS, baby!"

FAVORITE HOLIDAY AND SEASON?
"halloween, and autumn. figures, my birthday is close to both!"

FAVORITE WORD?
"knob."

FAVORITE FAMOUS DEAD PERSON?
"heath ledger."

FAVORITE TIME OF DAY?
"nine in the afternoon!"

FAVORITE COLOR?
"green"

FAVORITE BOOK?
"speak"

FAVORITE TOY?
"i'd have to say my mazda MX3. that's a toy, right?"

WELL, WASN'T THAT FUN? ON TO THE SERIOUS SHIT. TELL ME A BIT ABOUT YOURSELF.
"loud, sarcastic, sassy, upbeat, outgoing, laid back, playful, intelligent (even though i hardly show it), and loyal. okay, so, i can be a bitch sometimes. so what!?"

MHMM, AND WHAT ABOUT YOUR FAMILY?
"my family's never supported my music. after high school, i left them all to actually do something with my life than sit on their couch. the only one i'm actually still talking to out of my family, would be my younger brother, trent. he's adorable, and just turning eight in december. little guy has my eyes. i'd do anything for that kid, anything at all."

VERY INTERESTING. SO HOW DID YOU END UP IN AT THIS TOUR?
"i was born in england. im sure you all know where that is. blackpool, to be exact. after high school was finished, i caught a plane to california. i didn't expect to get all the way here until i found a tour. i mean, i wasn't actually expecting to get signed onto anywhere. who would want someone like me, right? but pomona had what i was lookin' for! i met up with the members, and they were looking for a lead guitar. i fit right in!"

RIGHT ON, MY FRIEND. SO, CAN YOU TELL US WHAT WAS YOUR BEST MEMORY?
"haha, wow. that's kinda tricky. i think it was when my brother turned three. mom and dad left to some fancy dinner, and i was stuck baby sitting him. we were sitting on the couch, watching an old re-run of batman. he was chasing around the joker. i slipped into the kitchen to get a re-fill of chocolate milk, and what do i hear? trent cackling like a crazy mofo! his impression of the joker's laugh was incredible, and i instantly fell in love with him ten times more."

HOW, LOVELY. AND WHAT ABOUT YOUR WORST MEMORY?
"my first date. yeah, i know. it was horrid. he took me to some, fancy place, and i don't do fancy. i had to wear a dress, and it was really tight (i was trying to impress him, of course). my movement was restricted, and i ended up falling all over the place in the hells i was wearing. i got a piece of lettuce stuck in my teeth, with he kept staring at until i yelled at him. on my door step, when he was saying goodbye, i went in for the kiss, and he backed away from me too far and fell off my porch. sigh."

NOW, JUST WONDERING. WHAT RELIGION ARE YOU EXACTLY?
"me? i don't really have a religion . . . im the neutral in the world. but, if i had to put myself under something, i'd say that i was atheist. just because im not a huge god believer, y'know? i wasn't born religious, and nothing's actually screamed out to me."

WHAT SORT OF CAREER WILL YOU GO INTO THEN?
"currently, im in a band. part time, i help out a record store, selling all the 80's tracks, and a few CDs of the newer noise. dream job? well, to be perfectly honest, i'd love to be a female diva! no, no. not like a model, or anything. i mean wrestling! sure, sounds far fetch, and really scary, but it's not."

WHAT HAPPENED TO BE YOUR FIRST WORDS?
"i wasn't informed. all i was told was that it was a swear word. i have a feeling it was ass, though."

OMGWTFBBQ?!? WELL, LOOK AT THAT. I'VE NEVER SEEN A GENIE ACTUALLY COME OUT OF THE BOTTLE. WHAT ARE YOUR THREE WISHES?
"first, i wish people weren't so attracted to my boobs. secondly, i wish that we could put all the stupid people on an island, and make them live with each other. lastly, i wish my brother the best life available to him."


WOW, WASN'T THAT FASCINATING?
"shut your fucking corn hole! i was being sincere . . ."

SO, YOU, UH, WITH ANYBODY AT THE PRESENT MOMENT?
"what!? a relationship? don't kid yourself, bud."

WELL, YOU WANNA GO OUT SOME TIME? WHERE CAN I TAKE YA?
"uhm, actually. no. i don't want to go out sometime. but, if i did accept, the movies would be a killer hit with me. or some kind of food join. hell, i'll even take some weird little, stroll in the park. just don't be an ass."

HEY, IF YOUR NOT BUSY FRIDAY...WANNA GO OUT?
". . . didn't i just tell you no? are you really that persistent!? do i need to use force to explain how much you piss me off!?"

ALRIGHT, WHATEVER. THIS INTERVIEW IS COMING TO AN END. ANYTHING YOU WANT TO TELL US?
"im going to go take a really, really, hot bath. and fall asleep on my balcony."

THIS FAKE INTERVIEWER DUDE GUY WILL SELF DESTRUCT IN FIVE SECONDS.
"oh, good god. he's a robot, too!?"
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ON THE STEREO,
LISTEN AS WE GO,
DRIVING DOWN THE 101.
ANGEL has been trying to escape this doggone planet for EIGHTEEN years,
but they've found themselves stuck in the vortex of role playing for SEVEN 1/2 years.
too bad. we could have busted them out if they didn't live all the way in
the PACIFIC timezone. you can always reach them at PMS.
hold up, you'll need the password, which is EVERYONE TAKES A BITE and we'll need
to see some proof that you're a GIRL. yep, pull down those pants.
ok, well, i'll just take your paperwork and be going:

CALIFORNIA HERE WE COME,
RIGHT BACK WHERE WE STARTED FROM.
say hold up, wait a minute. let me put some pimpin' in
it! yep, that's right, this sexy application template was made
by yours truly: CHRISS a.k.a. LENNY GOT LAID ?! @
CAUTION 2.0. yeah, see those fawesome lyrics? that be
california by none other than phantom planet. and by the way,
if you happen to remove this little credit, i'll sned vampires
after you in the night to rip out your jugular. and they won't
be as sexy as you think the cullens are. uh-huh.[/center]